A tribute to preschool wisdom

My family recently relocated with the military (more on that adventure here if you missed it) which means all of our young children went through the sometimes scary and always eventful process of beginning new schools and making new friends in a new place.

IMG_7421

Recently, while driving through our new town to my youngest son’s new preschool, I asked him to tell me a bit about his new friends in class. We discussed his peers in the true little-boy fashion I have come to know and love, which includes standard points like their names, what activities they do together, but also (and more importantly) what superheroes they like, what ninja moves they can do, and the fantastical tales they share about pirates, dinosaurs, outer space, and legos (all of which I’m certain I still don’t completely understand).IMG_6534

But what I found most interesting was his response when I asked him about one boy in particular that he mentioned playing with a lot, even garnering him with his “best buddy” status (which this kid doesn’t throw around lightly, believe. you. me.). Being the nosy mother I apparently am, I asked him what the little boy looked like. Not because it matters at all really, but because for some reason I wanted to see if I could find my son’s new “best buddy” in the class picture, or spot him on the story carpet at drop off. I don’t really know why, I think I was just excited that my little guy had a new friend more than anything else (and I tend to inherently want to know everything about everything our kids do. Sorry in advance to their girlfriends/boyfriends.)  So, I asked our son “what does your new best buddy look like?” and I really wasn’t ready for the preschool wisdom he was about to drop on me.

“I don’t know” he said.  “When I play with him, I look at him, but I just see a buddy. I don’t matter about the other stuff”

His simple, perfect answer hit me right in the chest and actually choked me up. Maybe it was because I was a little sleep deprived from being up with our 1.5-year-old the prior night, but mostly I think it was because he was so. right. on. And I… wasn’t. Because he was telling me, Mom, I don’t care about what he looks like in the way you are asking. All I see is my friend. And just like that, my little preschooler put me back in my place. Does it matter what his friend looks like? No, it doesn’t. Does it matter if I know what his friend looks like? No, it doesn’t. I don’t need to exert one ounce of my potential parental judgment into a classroom friendship that is making him happy.

IMG_2101

As adults, we tend to place so much emphasis on what we look like. In fact, I would even wager to say that we miss out on potential friendships because we can’t get past all of the things we “see” when we look at someone. Clothes, hair, color, shape, size, occupation… to name a few. Just think what we might see if we all looked at each other with a non-judgmental preschool heart. Past the physical qualities that so often define us to focus instead on our commonalities and shared experiences. Like being a mother or a father, a son or a daughter, a person looking for happiness, a person that likes dogs, sports, cooking, (or of course what ninja moves we can do, if only we could be as cool as our kids) or WHATEVER. What if we could “just see a buddy” in the people we meet? I for one, am going to try harder…

IMG_7082

So thank you, to my son for opening my eyes. And thank you, to his friend for playing with the new kid. May they enjoy many days of Batman, shark-hunting, and ninja-kicks together. And may we all bring a little preschool wisdom into our day.

 

fullsizeoutput_658Christiana is a Navy wife and mother of 3 inspiringly resilient military children, attorney and former realtor, world traveler, home renovator and decorator, yogi, fitness enthusiast, and recipe & wine explorer.

Photo credit: Tara Liebeck Photography

 

15 Ways the Stock Market is like Online Dating

Back in my younger days, before I was lucky enough to start dating the man who is now my dear husband, I tried online dating for a short spell.  I went on a date with a guy who cried the entire time into his beer about his recent split from his (ex)girlfriend.  I went on another date with a guy who, after I told him I wasn’t interested, hid in the bushes outside of my apartment for a few days.  (Police said because he wasn’t threatening me and the bushes were on county property, they couldn’t do anything.  That’s a story for another day).  Here is a picture of Sean Spicer hiding in the bushes so you an experience how creeped out I was…

Image result for hiding in the bushes meme

I had a few other weird encounters as well.  So, suffice it to say, I know a little bit about the world of online dating (at least in the olden times circa 2009 pre-Tinder.  I’m old, I know).

Now, as an investment advisor, I am always vigilantly watching and analyzing the stock market.  Recently, it dawned one me:  the market, in a lot of ways, is like online dating.

So, today I’d like to share with you the 15 ways that the stock market is like online dating, and how investments are like potential suitors:

  1. History usually repeats itself.  Markets are cyclical.  Just like potential suitors, you can count on them to revert back to their (previous/true) selves for a stretch every once in a while, no matter what kind of upswing they’ve been on for a while.  How long is the stretch though?  If I had a crystal ball and could you tell you that, I’d be a very rich woman.  The great news is that the stock market usually bounces back.  Significant others, though?  That remains to be seen, depending on the individual in question.Image result for not who I used to be gifYes, you usually are.
  2. Figuring out what you don’t want and avoiding it is a great strategy for long-term success.  What do I mean?  In investing, research shows that figuring out what the worst sectors (like technology or utilities, for example) are for long-term outlook (performance) and avoiding investing in them is a better strategy for performance of your portfolio than than strictly looking for the best investments based on positive markers alone.  The same goes with weeding through online dating options.  If you can, first, sift out the ones that have traits that you really dislike (dishonesty, bad grammar, smoking, cheating, lazy, etc.), you’ll have a much easier time picking the best ones from the group you have left.Image result for bad online dating profile gif
  3. Marketing doesn’t always match the facts.  What a company (or potential suitor) says about himself/herself may not be true once you get to know them a little bit better.  For example, analysts have found that some of the self-reporting on finances from certain non-U.S. countries hasn’t turned out to be 100% fact-based.  Comparatively, many of us who have experienced online dating know from personal experience that what someone says about themselves in their profile is also not 100% fact-based.  So, doing further research is always a good idea.  In finance, we call this due diligence.  The word due diligence also works for dating, since nowadays we can look up different social media accounts and learn a great deal about someone we don’t know personally.Image result for false advertising gif
  4. You can do all of the due diligence you want, but you really don’t know the potential suitor or investment until you are “in bed with them.” Potential love interests are on their best behavior in the beginning.  So you can do all of the research you want on them, but until you spend time with them getting to know them, you don’t really know them.  This is also true with a potential investment.  You can have completed all of the due diligence in the world, but nothing is guaranteed.  You won’t know the outcome of the investment until you put it in your investment portfolio.
  5. Sometimes the performance is a disappointment.  All signs may have pointed to him or her being great, but when the rubber meets the road, he/she tanks.  Same could be said for an investment you chose, unfortunately.Image result for lax bro online dating gif
  6. Reliability of an investment (or a potential suitor) and excitement don’t usually go hand in hand.  If you are looking for reliability and stability, jumping on to the new and exciting investment isn’t usually the way to go.  Have you ever heard the saying of, “Don’t put all of your eggs in one basket?”  Well, I’m here to tell you not to “put all of your eggs in the bad boy basket.”  Bad boys may seem exciting, but they are a big risk because they could turn out to be a total crash-and-burn, and they definitely aren’t easy to predict.  In the stock market, take Bitcoin (crypto-currency) as an example.  Crypto currency was exciting and new and “bad-ass” but look where things are now.  With big highs also comes big lows.  Image result for bad boy gif
  7. The strong ones have a long way to fall.  Take General Electric’s (GE) stock as an example. It used to be seen as a safe, stable investment, however, it tanked big time recently.  GE is like the frat boy born into a good family whose profile picture shows him with his lax bros in college.  You thought he would always just be stable: go to work, drink beer and watch football.  But one day he gets a DUI and then he’s jobless and in jail with a long road ahead of him to get back to his former glory.Related image
  8. All it takes is one insensitive political statement or unsolicited inappropriate picture to take down the whole man/company.  This one pretty much speaks for itself.  Both in your personal life and professional life, be careful what you do.  All it takes is one misspoken word, tweet or text to go from “highly regarded” to “bottom-of-the-barrell.”Image result for unsolicited naked picture gif
  9. If an investment or a potential suitor looks to good to be true, they usually are. Don’t fall for the “too good to be true” ones.  You’ll just get your heart and/or wallet broken!Image result for too good to be true gif
  10. What their friends say about them in the beginning is usually never true. In investments, when someone who will benefit financially from your purchase tells you it’s great, it’s always important to take their advice with a grain of salt.  The same can be said for the friends of your potential suitor.  Even though they don’t benefit (tangibly) in some way as a result of you dating their friend, they likely won’t tell you the whole truth about the potential suitor due to their loyalty.Image result for not who I used to be gif
  11. Everyone has an opinion and they are all different.  Lots of people have opinions about the stock market, online dating, potential suitors, and individual investments.  However, even the ones who claim to be “love experts” or “market experts” aren’t right all of the time.Image result for i am an expert gif
  12. Sometimes the undervalued ones are the greatest dark horses in the race. In finance, we spend a lot of time trying to find “undervalued stocks” to invest in, so we can take advantage of when they reach their full potential.  The same can be said for potential suitors.  My friend’s grandma used to always tell her, “Find a man with great potential.”  Sometimes, finding a potential suitor as they are still working to be their best selves can payoff in the greatest way, as you grow and become your best selves together.Image result for great potential gif
  13. Finding one with the best potential (undervalued) is a great strategy if you are willing to put in the time and the work.  In investments, some people believe in what is called the “Buy and Hold Strategy.”  This means that they believe that if you buy a basket of investments and hold them over a long period of time, the net result will be positive.  However, this strategy isn’t suited for the impatient investor, who feels compelled to get rid of an investment impulsively depending on the day.  The same can be said in your love life.  If you are an impatient person, investing your time and emotions into someone who has yet to reach their potential may not be the right strategy for you.  However, if you are willing to put in the time, you could end up with an amazing outcome in your love life!  Don’t be like this guy:Image result for undervalued man gif
  14. Having expectations can be a dangerous thing.  This is true both for your investments and your potential suitor.  Try to enter in with an open mind, after having done all of your due diligence, knowing that it’s never fully possible to predict the future 100%.  For both your money and your heart I suggest two important things:  1. Make the best choice possible based on your goals and dreams.  And 2. engage the help of professionals when you need it!
  15. Just when you least expect it, the stock market or the online dating community can surprise you in the best way.  Some days, you will wake up and be pleasantly surprised by the performance of the stock market, and thus, your investments.  The same can be said for the online dating world.  Some days, you will wake up to pleasant messages and wonderful potential suitors, and have very positive experiences that might change your life.Image result for happy surprise gif

 

Wishing you all of the love and financial health in the world,

Margo

 

 

 

Chipstarter: Building a Village For You

We find ourselves in a world where new technologies, social media, and digital personas have led to increased disconnectedness, mental health challenges, unrealistic personal standards and competitiveness, particularly for women and mothers. Modern day adulting, parenting and just life in general is hard. Our entire motivation behind this blog, behind each of our 100 previous posts is to make it just that tiny bit easier. 

DSC_4634BW

Not a day goes by that the 4 of us aren’t checking in with each other – venting, rejoicing, or just sharing a great meme. Ideally, we would stroll out to our communal backyard where we all share a glass of wine and hash out the day’s trials and tribulations, but that’s just not an option living in 4 separate states currently. We have realized we can use technology to our advantage to have that kind of support rather than letting it wear us down.

This blog has been the start of our collective call to share that kind of support in a bigger way. We want it to be FILLED with useful information, real life experiences and all the love for you wherever you are. But we also want to make this support even bigger.

When we share what we were brought here to give, we are in alignment with our highest, most powerful selves – Jen Sincero, You Are A Badass

We are planning a book – the encyclopedia of adulthood of sorts. A resource on all these topics we’re addressing now and more. Yeah, yeah, books are so old school now, we know. But hang in there – how many of you still picked up a copy of What To Expect When You’re Expecting (and probably completely freaked yourselves out because – woah, TMI)?? How many of you are reading Girl, Wash Your Face right now? Books are still a great way to have handy resources available.

200656_667477722276_1458301559_n

We’re also going to start a podcast to literally sit down and have a chat, woman to woman, mom to mom (maybe we’ll let a dude on sometimes too) and really get into the topics in a verbal format. Next up, an app with information and a platform to connect us all to our own mobile villages.

We have BIG DREAMS (because Rachel Hollis told us so and she’s everything)!!!!

Nobody gets to tell you how big your dreams can be. -Rachel Hollis, Girl, Wash Your Face

To jumpstart this expansion, or “Chipstart” as it were, we entered the Chipstarter 2018 contest. Chip Gaines – yes THE Chip Gaines, of Chip and Joanna Gaines, of Fixer Upper is giving out “Launch Your Dreams” grants. We all find them undeniably inspiring, from their extraordinary design work flipping houses to their commitment to family and community to their realness with each other on camera and beyond. When this showed up, we knew we were meant to go for it. Check out our video:

What we currently lack in videographic and technical skills, we make up for in passion and a drive to serve YOU! So tell us, what are the hottest topics that we can get you more information about? What do you want to know about us? This is, after all, all about you.

xoxo, Annie, Christiana, Kristy and Margo

A Modern Day Village: The Birth Worker’s Inspiration

images (8)

I recently had a conversation with a client who is about to be a first time Grandmother. As I listened to her speak about her worries about her daughter’s upcoming birth, her struggles during pregnancies with depression and Hyperemesis Gravidarium, I was completely struck by the feeling of isolation that she was describing in her daughter. She is the only one of her friends pregnant, and although she does have a Fiance, he is  not operating on the helpful wavelength that she needs.

Immediately, my head swirled with questions to find out more.

“Who did this new soon-to-be-mama have to ask questions to other than the doctor she sees once a month?

Why is no one there for her other than her mother? Is the doctor leading her to support groups, mothering circles, moms with prenatal or postpartum depression? What will she do when she actually HAS the baby? If she’s struggling with depression now, who will watch out for the signs/symptoms of it in the postpartum months? Who will help this woman!!!!!!!??????”

scared-baby-1024x585.jpg

A little voice in my heart spoke up right then.

You, silly. You’re a birth doula. You have all she needs. Help her.

images (7)

Almost moved to tears, the words fell out of my mouth reflexively. “I remember those feelings all too well in both of my pregnancies,” I said sympathetically. “It sounds like she could use a birth and postpartum doula.”

The only difference between this mama and me when I was going through those same terrible feelings while pregnant was, I wasn’t actually alone. I had my doula there one phone call away at any moment. I had the cohesion of care between my amazing midwives, my doulas, myself, and my team. I had created my village.

After explaining what a doula is and does to her, (if you still want to know what that is, reference my Demystifying Doulas post here) it occurred to me that in some cases, women have no idea of the need for a village.

carousel-kattie
Photo Cred Doulamatch.net

Back in the day, we lived in literal villages that would commune together for the birth of a new village member, and either call the midwife or have one on hand. 9 times out of 10, the birthing mother had a sister, mother, friend, neighbor, SOMEONE, with her until the midwife could arrive to her. Thus, the doula is born. Even female elephants know the importance of gathering around to form an impenetrable barrier of support for the birthing mother. I frickin’ love elephants.

elephants.jpeg

While modern-day women and birthing communities are certainly bringing doulas back, there is still too large a proportion of women who go unsupported during the pregnancy, birthing, and postpartum process. Why, you ask? Mostly because, they do not know we exist. It is the lack of conversation, or the lack of clarity on our exact role, that I sadly have to believe is one of the main reasons that birth has the potential to be such a traumatic experience for some women.  Having the guidance of your doula to shepherd you into the parenting life with grace, provide you with materials to support you every step of the way, can provide you with your lifeline if when you need it.

A glorious benefit in making the choice to hire a doula is that he/she may in turn lead you to your permanent, modern village.

Truth is, the years of preconception, pregnancy, transitioning to becoming a mother of one, two, three, multiples, etc., can come with many mixed emotions. No matter what your situation turns out to be when you find out you are pregnant, the feeling of isolation can be sudden and agonizing. When hiring a doula, you’re not only receiving the personal care of a hands-on teammate in your birthing journey, you are also DSC01327choosing an expert in community, local resources, birth education, knowledge of primary care givers specific work, and access to birth related evidence, articles, and, yes, even a postpartum sounding board. The doula will, in essence, be your trail guide for navigating the rough and unknown waters of this new chapter.

It is time, now, that we stop isolating ourselves as mothers. Let’s remind our world that we have been supporting each other proudly and strongly for…well…since the dawn of humankind. We do not need to do it alone. It may feel too daunting a task going to these mothering circles full of strangers, organizing birth class dinners at your house, or even seeing a therapist to get the necessary prescriptions to aid you. What if, in lieu of uncertainty of the support you need, you could Call. Your. Doula.

We can support this adventure every step of the way. We are here, so that you can be here and present through the whole process.

benefits_16.jpg

Now that I have you convinced of the awesomeness of unconditional education and no-judgement support during your birthing years, let me illuminate the steps necessary to finding your perfect doula.

  1. Ask a friend: Ask around for a connection or connect with the doulas in your area by using the ultimate doula search engine: Doula Match  
  2. Interview a few: Find the right candidate by sitting in the energy of several different people.  Remember, you are hiring for a job, so the right fit is important. Birth is a vulnerable experience, so pick someone who will make you feel completely safe, who makes you feel confident, and someone by whom you and your birth partner feel empowered.
  3. Ask all the questions: Make sure you understand their vision of care, fees, and schedule and those align with what you had in mind for your birth vision. After all, it is your birth, the team you hire should complement it in every way with encouragement and advice that makes you feel informed. Do you want a doula just for prenatal education and birth? Do you know you’ll need postpartum care? Do you even know what that means? Does this person have the resources for all of that?
  4. Contract: You should always enter into a contract with your doula. That way there is an expectation of care that is agreed upon by all parties. This agreement is key, as mentioned above, it will be the catalyst for your new life as a mother.
  5. Get excited: Your doula should help you feel connected to birth classes, books, and other materials to prepare you for your upcoming experiences and all outcomes!

We all need the help. It is up to us to choose, in this modern world, just what our helping hand will look like. Most of us consider this calling a service to womankind alike. I am here to let you know it’s out there. I am writing to speak aloud that we are everywhere. We are your friends, neighbors, sisters, mothers, co-workers and colleagues, gym members, professionals, and tradeswomen.nature.jpg

We are your village, and we are here for you.

Kristy is a doula, massage therapist, energy worker and mom of 2 in Virginia.

 

Zen As A Mother: Kristy’s Simple Guide to Creating Your At Home Zen Space

images
Oh, there you are!

Now that school is back in session, I have found gratitude in some straight up sol-i-tude. Know what I’m sayin’? Rather than spending this time binge watching “This is Us” (no judgement if that is how you relax) or adding on work hours that would leave me depleted when the kids got home, I’ve decided to dedicate this time where I am transitioning in so many ways to starting each day with some zen time.

This has always been a hard concept for me, because my house has never felt…well….zen-able. I have struggled with the ability to turn off my anxiety in order to sit peacefully without the checklist of things that I have to get done before I turn my “mom” back on. I realize now, that that notion is no longer working for me.

zen frog

So, I put on my Namaste big girl pants and tackled a space in my house that has been many things. A guest room, a Massage Room, the room where I kept all my LulaRoe clothing inventory (yes I did do that for a time) and now, I have transformed it into a loving and welcoming environment for all those family members who wish to find peace with meditation.

SOOOOOOO, without further Ado, I give you my guide to making your seemingly impossible chaotic space….zenified.

images (5)

  1. Find a subtle corner: It doesn’t have to be an elaborate room or even a huge space, if you feel at peace in a corner of your bathroom with Cindy Lauper blaring, do that.
  2. Declutter your space; Declutter your mind: Make sure you vacuum, sweep, remove any trash or clutter items, so that energy can flow nicely and there are less distractions in your space. In the Ultimate Beginners Guide to Feng Shui, (Feng Shui being an ancient Chinese version of creating harmony in your living or working space) “In a clear and organized space, energy can flow freely and feelings of guilt and unrest might vanish too.” I know that clutter makes me feel irritated and judegmental of myself and my surroundings, and disorganization of my space adds to my anxiety and scatter-brained moments. So, clear answer is a clear space leads to a clear mind.
  3. Meaningful Decorating: For me, it is super important to feel inspired by the art that surrounds me. Whether it invokes a sense of peace, a pleasant memory, or makes me feel cloaked in the guidance of a loved one who has passed, each piece in my zen space has meaning. My personal space has some living energy in the plants that remind me of divine guidance and the readiness of life to bloom at any moment.
  4. Sacred clearing: Not only do we declutter our space of “things”, we must also declutter our space of energy. If you haven’t heard of smudgingimg_0031 with sacred sage before, now is the time to jump on that train. It can be a smudge stick, or it can come in spray form, but the idea is the same. According to Jane Alexander in her article Smudging, “It [smudging] is the equivalent of spiritual spring cleaning.” There is a ton of information out there about the origins of this practice, but for our purposes here, I will explain my intentions. Sacred sage, for me, allows any energy that will influence my mediation practice to be cleared. I believe the smoke from burning the smudge stick will attach to the energies. So, I fill the room, open all the windows, and blow the energy out to the earth. This way, I am clear of any influences or energies that are not my own.
  5. Sound Elements: Sound therapy is always a plus for keeping energy flowing and clear as it is moving through your space. In this amazing book, How to Heal with Singing Bowls, Suren Shrethsa explains that “clients have experienced a wide array of benefits from deep stress relief and relaxation, to a reduction in chronic pain.” One can also use music of all kinds, guided meditation tapes, or water elements such as this fountain for the sound therapy as well.
  6. Get Cozy: In my zen space, I use a sham pillow that’s cushy and cozy to sit on. You, however, may choose to lay, sit in a meditation chair, stand, or even do yoga. The choice is yours, just get comfy so your body can fully relax.
  7. Set up your Altar: There are a million ways to set up your altar space. Setting up an altar with statues, figures, photos, intention candles, or relics that pay homage to your higher power, can help ground your reflections and connect you to that source you find most comforting. It does not have to be about an organized religion, but just think about what makes you feel unconditional love, and place your reminders on your altar. Mine has a heart that reminds me of the sacred union between my heart and the universe, and a mantra that reminds me to light my soul’s fire and be fearless in that. I also love to remember that the world is full of magic, so I am inspired by peacock feathers and a fairy next to my orchid.
  8. Protect your space: believe it or not, it’s super easy to be effected by the energy of others while creating sacred space for you. If your kids are at home, or your neighbors are cutting the grass, their influential distractions can take their toll. I like to put up special mirrors, called Bagua mirrors that deflect negative energies and keep them from entering your space and on the other side, keep positive vibes in. Rad, right?
  9. Time for zen. Now, it’s up to you. Go forth, my loves, and get your zen on, whatever that means to you.

img_0035

Kristy is a doula, massage therapist, energy worker and mom of 2 in Virginia.

Strong Women Series: Introducing Dr. Sara Smith Wellness.

We all hopefully have someone in our life that inspires us regularly. That inspiration can lead to anything. Slowing down and focusing, reaching out, emboldening dreams, or recognizing the need for change.
In this series, we at Real As a M*ther hope to lift these strongly and fiercely motivated women up by featuring them specifically on our blog. Today, I am delighted and honored to call to the world’s attention to my friend, Dr. Sara Smith. 
unnamed
Heart Emoji
I met this caring and soulful practitioner back in the day when we worked together at a chiropractic clinic. In that year of commiserating about life and work, we discovered that we have a bond that goes beyond the workplace. We share a common love of mind-body work and spiritual empowerment. I observed her actively seeking positivity which I find truly admirable – especially in this modern world of so much negativity.  I have since found her insight to be invaluable in the many seasons of my life since.
1916787_592344225337_3472635_n

 

So, enough about our relationship! Let me gush, now, about her expertise and experience.

She is a Certified Wellness & Life Coach with a professional background as a Doctor of Physical Therapy (PT) and Certified Yoga Instructor. She is a working mother of two, and a super badass wife to her husband and a prominent member of her community in the Eastern Shore of Virginia.

SARA MOM

Professionally, with her “multifaceted knowledge base, intensely caring attitude, intuition, and light touch of humor she guides her clients to find simple solutions to their most stressful and seemingly habitual problems so they can finally move forward with confidence and ease.” She is described as having “a gift to help her clients reconnect with their own core confidence so that they can tap into their innate wisdom, courage, and strength to find balance amidst very demanding professional and/or parental obligations.”

In her PT practice, Sara focused her studies in women/men’s pelvic health as well as chronic pain management. She has found that when we are not connected physically and mentally to our pelvis and core, when we lack physical strength and healthy “core” habits, we also tend to falter emotionally and spiritually. Woah – that’s deep. Literally. Her beautifully designed programs and gentle intuition remove the layers of resistance to help uncover those core weaknesses and transform them into core confidence and strength. True healing from the inside out.
She has lead numerous mind, body, and spirit conscious workshops. She combines these modalities in ways that create EASY habit change.  In these retreats, Sara mentions that she has been witness to “sacred sharing amongst other women that creates a level of profound awakening and healing and atunement to the people they are around.”
Image result for Sara Smith Wellness
When I asked her what her general energy was around starting healing retreats, she said “I want people to know that the frustrations they’ve had, the real life anger, anxiety sadness, the BIG EMOTIONS that make us feel ‘less than’…. within those things… it’s ok. And those can be very helpful to us.” Her upcoming retreat this November, for example, is focused around a blend of acknowledging the REAL emotions we feel as women, and the dreams and “crazy” yearnings that keep tapping us on the shoulder that we feel we need to push away cause it isn’t “practical”. This is a safe place to release the energetic gunk that holds us back.
It can be a quiet, sacred place to hear and deeply KNOW the next step to creating an action plan. This is for women, like me, who are hardwired to help others..so much they seem to keep putting themselves on the back burner BUT they know, truly know, something must change. I can show them how, and I am so honored to do so. A sacred small group has specifically been chosen in order to generate great power of group healing.
Ummmmmmmm, Sign a sister up! And thats exactly what I did after interviewing her. I am so excited to get my rejuvenation on.
restreat.jpg
I have to say that one of the inspirations for featuring Sara today is my experience with her being her birth doula.  I had the honor of being with her for the birth of her eldest son, who has since been diagnosed with a very severe form of Childhood Apraxia of Speech. Her strength showed through from those first moments and through each hurdle along that path since. She has become an active advocate for her son, and has been celebrating the milestones along with him in his speech development journey.  If you are not familiar with Apraxia, here is some information about it.
Sara’s blog is dedicated to the emotions that come with being surprised with a special needs child in the family.
37007487_1286014918203637_7782206206042439680_n
It has rocked so much of our life and through education, awareness, and love, I hope to teach other adults and children that unforeseen differences can be the greatest gifts.
Right on, Sara. Right the freak on.  In a world of differences, it is my hope today that we can find a commonality in pursuing self reflection, and the gratitude with finding peace within our personal growth.
Please give it up for Sara Smith, personal life coach to this blogger, and general badass mama, lover of healing, and one amazing woman.
images (3).jpeg
Thank you for showing the world your insides, so that we all may have a better perspective on life.
I love you, girl
—Kristy and the Real As a M*ther crew.
healer

10 Reasons why your kids are like law school roommates from Hell

As I transition into this season of my life where I spend more of my day surrounded by children than adults, I have noticed some striking similarities between my darling young children and another group of people with whom I was privileged to spend a good number of my days as well. Wait for it… law students.

adult blur books close up

Now, you may think “whoa, whoa, whoa my kid is definitely not a blood-thirsty litigator-to-be or self-righteous mumbler of constitutional convictions!”  I hear you. But truly, neither are most law students.  Actually, based on my (dare I say, experienced?!) observations, law students and young kids share some pretty similar day-to-day living habits. And really, this list just makes me laugh out loud.

10 Reasons why your kids are like law school roommates from Hell:

1. They attempt to use words in discussion that they don’t really understand yet.

2. They try to pass off pajamas as proper clothes. (Particularly to school.)

3. They pass out in random places, at random times.

4. They try to steal, and subsequently lose ALL your notes.

This includes lists, calendars, and pretty much anything else in paper form.

5. They start arguments over the smallest issue for no apparent reason.

6. They seem to exist entirely on snack food.

And leave said snack food in ALL the couches.

7. They say they “want to read” with you and then bolt after the first few pages.

8. They unapologetically raid your groceries.

IMG_6628

9. They continue to debate an issue ad nauseum long after a decision has been reached.

10. They can, without fail, think of 998 other things that urgently need doing before homework.

In reality, I had two super-fab law-school roommates who are now both super successful #lawyermoms and (unlike myself) fully understood the words they used and did NOT pass out in random places. But let’s be honest, we were all kind of like this all “knew someone”

Keep laughing friends, Monday is already partway through! Cheers to your week (perhaps with your littlest roommates) from REAL AS A M*THER!

fullsizeoutput_658Christiana is a Navy wife and mother of 3, attorney and former realtor, world traveler, home renovator and decorator, yogi, fitness enthusiast, and recipe and fine wine explorer.

Photo credit: Tara Liebeck Photography