So, part of what led me to this awesome blog adventure is an ultra-inspiring book called The Universe Has Your Back: Transform Fear To Faith by Gabrielle Bernstein. The book plopped into my life at the exact moment I needed to hear her message: don’t let fears about the future stop you from following your passions.
Meditation and positive thinking have been shown to have very significant positive effects on all sorts of aspects of one’s health. And, I’m not just talking about mental health. In this study published in 2015 in the International Journal of Cardiology by CM Dubois et al on patients with coronary artery disease a meta analysis “showed that positive constructs were associated with reduced rates of rehospitalization or mortality”. Let me break that down for you – if you had a positive outlook, you were less likely to have to go back to the hospital or DIE from your heart disease. There are similar findings for diabetes, arthritis, and of course depression, anxiety and all sorts of psychiatric disorders.
I had lived in fear about the time commitment of writing a blog, even though I knew it would be fun and fulfilling for me, for literally, years. Letting go of that fear was obvious.
My Our decision about baby number 3 was more difficult. You see, even though my ovaries and soul (are those the same thing? a question for later….) were crying out for more, my level headed hubby was quick to point out all the reasons not to rock the boat. I couldn’t figure out if it was fear or logic holding me up.
I decided to sit down with one of Gabriella’s meditations where you clear your mind and ask [The Universe, God, Uncle Tony (if you’re my mom)] for a clear sign that you’re on the right path guided by love and joy. Having done yoga and meditation for about a decade, I still struggle to clear my mind every. dang. time I start a meditation. But, not this time!! When I wanted something to *pop* into my mind as my sign I’d look for, nothing. Blank, black, peaceful nothing. And then, finally, clear as day, this roars into my head:
“Potato potato, ching chong tomato!”
Um, excuse me Universe? That’s my sign?? The absurd line from an insomnia meme I looked at 3 days ago?? At the same time, I realized the Universe was probably looking at me going, “Really?? How do you expect me to pull that one off? Most people pick owls or the numbers 1234.”
I decided to go for a second sign. Peanuts! I always think of little babies as a peanut. So, peanuts in the shell seemed like a much more doable sign.
On went my life in a bit of a blur. The usual day-to-day was extra-challenging because Noemi got the dreaded post-cold-ear-infection and was miserable and so clingy and whiny (and yes even doctor moms stress about whether their kid does or does not need antibiotics). Today, FINALLY, she was well enough to go back to preschool and I got to go to the gym and the grocery store without a child in tow – basically a mini-vacation! As I waltz through the grocery store in my post-workout chill, I am contemplating, “how in the heck am I going to find ‘potato, potato, ching chong tomato’?”. Maybe my sign was getting an ovarian cyst a month ago and that emotional breakdown and I am overdoing it asking for a specific sign… Suddenly, I’m starving and head for the deli section. And stop dead in my tracks.
The middle prepared food cart has, in this order, french fries – mashed potatoes – 2 containers of crappy “Chinese” food – and tomato-vegetable soup. I kid you not. Potato, potato, ching chong tomato. I almost keeled over in shock. Then, I immediately was mortified and mentally berated myself that I had associated the Chinese food with “ching chong”. I quickly convinced myself I was reading too much into this. In a daze, I ambled over to the produce aisle, where I ran smack-dab into the large display of… peanuts in shells. Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit. You could have knocked me over with a feather. (I start talking in all my mom’s southern sayings when I’m in heightened emotional states, it’s not something I can control).
So, friends, moral of the story is: If you’re unsure that you’re following your joy and a decision is right for you, ask for a sign! Make it specific, and then be open to find it. If it’s meant to happen, the Universe will find a way! And also, this blog will, probably at some point in the next year, feature my pregnancy stories if I am reading the signs right 😉
My favorite app for guided meditations is the Insight Timer (they don’t pay me). It is free, has thousands of guided meditations from 1 to 90 minutes long and also just a timer setting for quiet meditation.